My Six Year Anniversary off Cigarette's and Nicotine! I am No Longer Phillip Morriss' Bitch!!

Along Monday of this week (November 11th) being a day to celebrate our Veterans and the freedom they provide us, this is a really special day of the year for me. This is the "luckiest" day of my life. Six years ago today, I quit my 30 year addiction to cigarettes and nicotine! 11/11/07 is the day I got another chance. I had COPD, beginning stage emphysema and when the doctors told me in a matter of fact, flat out tone, "I...t's not IF you will get the oxygen tank, its WHEN and HOW BIG WILL IT BE?!" I KNEW they weren't kidding!! They did not nag me or tell me how bad cigarettes were for me as I already knew--I just COULD NOT quit! I had tired EVERYTHING and more than once!! Funny thing, a brand new method had come out and it was called Chantix......no one had heard any negative side effects, no one had even heard of it, including my own doctor!! I went to the stop smoking clinic at Kaiswer medical center and began getting the psychological habits and issues under control and had started on the patch. I had to "fail" the patch which was not all that hard....I could always get down to the first step but when I went down in milligrams and to the second step--FORGET IT!! I SMOKED! After I failed, I went on Chantix (the anti-quit, non- nicotine replacement medication) and prayed to GOD it would work! I did everything to ensure the odds were gonna be stacked in my favor: I sought on-line support, I blogged for a solid year (I needed something to do with my hands instead of hold onto a cigarette) and followed other people's on-line journies (A special shout out to the following sites and people: Maggie's Mind, Brandie Collins, Antonio R. Howell and a 78 year old holocaust survivor who encouraged me DAILY and told me about his time in the death camps and having to relinquish his old ideas that a cigarette meant comfort-- just for a second, the smell of a cigarette would take away the smell of the burning bodies in the camps) so young lady, "If Chantix worked for me, it will work for you ..... just believe!!" Its funny how people are placed in your life for a reason....I thank God every day that I am no longer a slave to nicotine or Phillip Morris' bitch! If you want to quit, all things in life are possible!! Just do it! If you blow it again, pick another plan and try it again!

Over three years....but who is counting?

It has been awhile since I have posted...my goal starting this blog was to give me something to do with my hands when I quit smoking. I am beginning to think I should have never stopped blogging and I thinking about revising this blog and starting again...blogging is good for the soul.....anyway, I just wanted to let you all know that I still am smoke free and living life. I hope that is if anyone is thinking about quitting, they go ahead and do it. Its the best thing I ever did!

November 11th 2009--Two Years off Cigarettes!!

Man, a lot has changed since I last logged on to my blog.....first off my days off cigarettes counter link disappeared! Oh well, I can go update it later. It has been two years since I have smoked a cigarette...ok, I did try to smoke a flavored cigar once in that time period and I got sick to my stomach. I put it out and haven't looked back since! Don't get me wrong, I still think about a cigarette from time to time......when I get stressed, when I get happy, when I am bored but its just not worth it! I have saved a TON of money, smell better and do not have to try to sneak out and smoking because I am having a nicotine fit! If you are trying to quit, it is possible! I NEVER thought I would be able to do it. Thanks to Chantix, blogging and the supportive friends I made on this journey I feel truly blessed!

Peace,
Diva

Yes, I am Still Out Here....I Cannot Believe its Been Six Months Since I Have Posted!

Hey There Everyone!

Let me just say, I feel sooooooo disconnected from this blog! I logged on and was reading some blogs of people that I met when I was actively blogging and realized how disconnected I feel from blog land! I am more determined than ever to reformat this blog and start posting again! It was my goal last year but now that summer is coming, its time! I miss hearing from everyone and hope you guys are doing well.

For anyone still reading, I am still a non-smoker! I did have one slip up recently when I found one of those thinner flavored cigar type things that I had hidden in a drawer. I managed to convince myself that I wasn't really smoking and lit it up! Boy, it was disgusting! I was really scared that smoking the cigar was going to trigger a big smoking episode but it didn't. I took like five puffs, and was like, "Gross!" I called a few people to discuss the incident but have not picked up anything since. I still think about smoking a Marlboro from time to time but I know how hard it is to stay stopped so I just leave it at just a thought.

The school year is just about over and I am really exausted and burned out! I survived the year at a big school. Speaking of school, there were thousands of teachers out here in California "Pink-Slipped" and people are really afraid of losing their jobs. It is a scary economy and time. Our union members are voting for a one day solidatary work stoppage strike next week. The strike would be held on May 15th. I really feel like I need to stand with the people who are in serious danger of losing thier positions. I did not get a pink slip and feel grateful but know that if GM is talking about closing its plant for a few months, ANYTHING is possible!

I am still trying to get into work out mode and am thinking about registering for the Avon Breast Cancer walk. It is a two day walk and it would force me to train! One day you walk either 26 miles or 13.5 miles. They next day you walk another 13.5 miles. I know a few people who have done it and it seems like a great idea. I would train all during the summer and the actual walk would be in the middle of September. I would need to raise at least $1,800 dollars but think I am up to the challenge. We will see!

Lastly, this summer I did not apply for any academic fellowships and just plan on chilling! I am going to the Oregon Coast and Portland for two weeks and am not sure what else I have planned. I hope all is well with everyone!

Peace,
Diva

Happy New Year...Or Should I Say Happy Inaguration!

Hey all....I am still alive and still off cigarettes! Staying smoke-free is still a struggle at times! I was in Vegas recently and a couple times it seemed kind of tempting but I really do not want to go back to being a slave to big tobacco. I have also been off work and have not really had much to say out here in blog-land! I have kind of been being a bum so to speak! As a teacher, I work non-stop and then when I do get my three weeks off for winter break, I just feel like relaxing. I did that for three weeks and now it is back to "real life."

Now that the party is OVER I figured it was finally time to post something! My first goal for the year is to update my blog...we will see. I have been wanting to do it since last summer and have not managed to get around to doing it! Can you say "Procrastination?" I can, its the story of my life! Sometimes I am totally on top of things and other times.....forget it!

Anyway, I went back to work this week after having three weeks off and boy was it hard! I am not used to waking up so early. Neither were my students so all of us were brain-dead! Also, I am at a new school and I am still totally not used to the schedule or how things happen. We have "final week" in three weeks so that is definitely a change! The school is really different for me! I went from teaching at a really small high school of 75 students 4 teachers, 1 principal, 1 office manager and 2 teachers assistance to a huge comprehensive high school that has 3,200 students, 20 administrators and over 200 teachers!! I cannot even figure out how many support staff members are on campus! In some ways its good and in some ways it sucks! I am just grateful to have a job as the California state budget is not looking too good and even in the schools, it is looking like a lot of people will lose their jobs.

I am excited that Obama is taking office next week and am hoping for positive change, especially in the economy. It just keeps getting scarier and scarier! I mean, all of these companies going bankrupt....I keep seeing more and more people losing their jobs. Circuit City seems to be one of the next getting ready to liquidate a lot of their store inventories. I will be happy to see a new regime in the White House and am hoping for things to get better for all. What are you guys more looking forward to in the future??

Peace,
Fierce Diva

I Miss Blogging! Final Hot for the Holidays Weight Loss Post

Hey There!
I cannot believe that I have not posted anything since my year anniversary off cigarettes! Amazingly enough, I still do not smoke cigarettes and even though I think about them, I know that if I actually light up, I do not know if or when I will be able to quit again. I always try to remember that I am "A puff away from a pack a day habit" and I really do not want to go back to being a slave to Nicotine or should I say Nico-demon! When I went to the doctor's the other day he told me they were getting a ton of reports about Chantix side effects and all I can say is I am glad it worked so well for me. I am glad that I was able to take it and have it successfully assist me in my quit! Blogging helped quite a bit also. Support is always nice.

I really miss blogging but have been too busy to even post anything. Also, since I am working two jobs, I am feeling too lazy! I guess I really am an all or nothing kind of girl as I either really blog, work out, eat right, quit smoking or I don't. I have been kind of so-so with my eating plan but really wanted to post since its the end of the Hot for the Holidays contest. I also felt bad after a couple people were kind enough to e-mail me, and ask exactly where the hell I was. I figured I should at least check in.

First, I want to send a shout out to Christie O. over at "Baby Tea Leaves" Blog. She so rocks for hosting the Hot for the Holidays Contest. It is a really motivating experience to know even if I screw up for the week, someone else is going to motivate me to get on task for the next week. I do not know how much I have lost since the beginning of the "Hot for the Holidays" contest, but I do know that I have lost a total of 20 pounds since August 16, 2008. This week I lost two pounds which put me at 20 pound mark instead of 18! For whatever reason, I just like the sound of a solid 20 better!

Even thought my diet and exercise program is FAR from perfect, I have made significant changes that I can pretty much stick with. I STILL pack my lunch daily and do not eat a ton of junk! I have had only one meal in the school cafeteria and that was out of desperation! I try to avoid junk foods for the most part and have cut certain foods out of my diet completely or eat them really rarely. Soda is like a once a month treat! I could not go back to eating the way I was and when I have eaten a couple of really bad meals or I ate too much, I got very sick! My body just cannot process food the way it used to! That could be considered a good or a bad thing. For example, I went to Magianno's for Thanksgiving dinner and basically stuffed myself! The food there is AMAZING and it was "All you can eat." Lets just say I got SUPER sick and just because "All you can eat" is offered does not mean I need to take the restaurant up on it! I need to be able to see at least half my plate and then see the food on it! I do not think I will eat like that again any time soon. Anyway, thanks for all of the motivation Christie and fellow bloggers! I am not going to go nuts now that the contest is over...in fact my plan is to SCHEDULE more exercise into my week! I see these two women I work with walking around the school every morning like clockwork and the are literally MELTING away....since September they have lost a ton of weight and their determination has motivated me! I see them walking for probably a half hour EVERY morning no matter what the weather and the results speak for themselves! I have taken it as far as I can go with dietary change! I really need to commit to more exercise!

Anyway, for all of you who have been participating in this challenge, keep up the good work and congratulations to everyone on their losses.

Peace,
Fierce Diva

Happy Birthday to Me!!

Hey all! I actually made it...a year and one day off cigarettes! I have REALLY wanted one the last couple of days but I keep telling my head, "Thanks for sharing.....it will pass!" I kept remembering the pick of the lady smoking through her neck and pulled it up. It reminds me of the insanity of nicotine addiction! I have kind of resigned myself to the idea that I will probably always think of smoking but I don't have to light one up! I know how sneaky that evil drug Nicotine is....its always waiting for a trigger or a weak moment. Blogging has helped me as much as the Chantix has. I will have to keep posting. I decided to post the picture of the gross smoking neck more for myself than to shock others! Every time I want a cigarette I always think about this! If you are thinking about quitting, it really is worth it! Most of the time, I really do not miss this horrible habit!

Peace,
Diva